Cat Not Included

This Denville, New Jersey home is adorable, but the cat is cuter :)

80s Rocking Bathroom

The sight of this shiteous North Jersey bathroom brought me right back to the 1980s ... Music from Tears for Fears. A time when I actually liked Madonna. Spuds MacKenzie and Ray-Bans were the rage. Ya feel me?

Dream Kitchen

I haven't updated this blog much because being unemployed, I'm no longer in a position to look at homes.

I did scope out this gem in Wayne, NJ though. Check it.

Holy Hotness!

Check out this guy or couple's (male hats?) bedroom. The walls are plastered with relatives and loved ones, then suddenly, BAM! SHIRTLESS MAN LOOKIN' MUCH TOO SEXY!

Boris The Spider!

Can you spot the leftover Halloween decoration?

Kitty Not Included

Hello Kitty! Kitty not included, but lovely view of ShopRite and two soda machines are all yours for the price of $265,000 in Netcong, New Jersey.

Who's your decorator?

"Let's match the chairs to the wallpaper, honey!"

Picture Perfect

This is a first, a real estate image framed and fancy? Weird!

Kitty Porn

I love when cats make it into real estate photos. I truly do. I could do an entire website just featuring kitty cats sneaking into real estate photos. No lie.

Futuristic Fireplace

Normally I bombard you with photos of shiteous homes or people sneaking into Realtor's pictures.

For once I found a semi-decent house, yet guffawed at the sight of this weirdo-looking wood burning stove. I think that's what this is. Looks more like a space ship or some shit. Why does this image seem so funny to me? Anyone?

Why bother? Seriously!

Searching for homes in New Jersey, I am yet again stumped. 

My initial reaction at viewing the cozy snow-covered exterior shot of this mint green gem was, "Not bad for $119K." I then made the mistake of clicking around to view additional photos.

The second thought that came to mind, "Why bother including interior photos?" Like, really. I'm at a loss for words here.

Remember two-tone jeans? Here's a two-tone house!

Guess they couldn't decide which color they preferred?

Wait 'Til The Landscapers Leave...

before you take your damn photos!

An overzealous real estate photographer just couldn't wait to snap this exterior shot of a house in East Hanover, NJ.

Proud To Be An American, Part Two

Yet another proud American has ruined their lovely home with lots of red, white and blue.

Whatcha Watching?

Is that a bloody animal mouth on the left side of the TV screen? Whatever it is, is almost as scary as the tightness of this living room. "Everyone scoot over, I need to get to the bathroom!"

Bless This Mess

Forget calling the show Stagers, a Hoarders intervention may be more appropriate.  Geez, who sells a house this messy? Look at the island in the kitchen!

"Groovy Wallpaper"

The description under this photo on the MLS site seriously read "groovy wallpaper" -- I'd describe it as vomit-inducing.

Boop Boop De Boop

Like Betty Boop much? This seller sure does!

Cabinet/Dishwasher

We've seen wallpapered cabinets, but here's something I've never seen before ... 

It appears to be a cabinet door super glued to a dishwasher. Geez, what'll they think of next?

Triangular House

You must be very tiny to live in this house. A bump on the head will surely result with a step to the left or a step to the right. The ad for this Sussex County, NJ house features this lone image.